We all cope with grief differently. Some lug the whole carcass around, huge and unpenetrated. Others poke into it bit by bit through memory, recalling, telling; others sublimate into art or another activity, or find consolation in spiritual union, believing the person's soul will to heaven, or be reincarnated; others may approach it with a sort of philosophical spin, voicing out the koan, 'Who dies?' Some of us fall deeply, madly in love with our grief. Some retreat from life. Some fill up with increased purpose and energy. We all heal differently. The crucial healing - it may never be total, it often occurs bit by bit - can happen through environment: loving, stable, soothing, robust.
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